IWBAACTWITOS Chapter 25

When we stepped out into the garden blanketed in white snow, Yan released my hand excitedly and bounded forward.

Asher, who'd been holding my other hand, also seemed thrilled by the snow—his blue eyes went perfectly round.

I smiled and let go of his hand, then went over and pushed them both forward encouragingly.

The snow that had started falling a few hours ago had piled up so deep that one step would sink your foot completely. I planted my footprint in a section where no one had walked yet.

I didn't like snow when it melted and turned everything slushy, but fresh-fallen snow like this felt nice.

'Besides, I'm not the one who has to shovel it.'

Several servants were clearing paths with large snow shovels so people could walk through. They'd deliberately piled the cleared snow up high, as if telling us to play with it.

The adults settled into a spot where the snow had been cleared in advance, watching us play. When Charlotte said something to Julian, he smiled warmly.

They must know what the tiara I received means, but they showed no reaction whatsoever.

'Right. They probably think it's too early to respond to something like that.'

Maybe I was overreacting. While I was lost in thought for a moment, Asher and Yan each rolled up a snowball and brought them over to me.

Asher's snowball was smaller than Yan's but had almost no dirt on it, while Yan's snowball was quite large but had dirt and dead grass stuck all over it.

Their actions were similar, but the results revealed their personality differences—I couldn't help laughing. Whatever they took my laughter to mean, both of them seemed even more excited.

"I'll make one more."

"Why? You can just combine it with Asher's."

"No."

The one who flatly refused was Asher. Yan also turned his head away sharply as if he hated the idea too. I made a small snowball and held it in my hand as I asked Asher:

"Why not, Asher?"

"It's dirty."

"I don't like small ones either."

'Ugh, these brats are so childish I could die.'

I started scraping the surface of Yan's large snowball with the snowball I was holding.

Once it was reasonably clean, I gathered some snow and asked the servant who'd been building our hideout to lift Asher's snowball on top of Yan's.

"This one's mine now."

Having stolen the snowball both of them had worked so hard on right before their eyes, I started reinforcing the neck so it wouldn't roll off.

The two of them, robbed of their snowball in an instant, stared at me with devastated eyes.

"What? Got a problem? If you have a problem, you two can make another one together."

The two brats looked extremely dissatisfied, but without saying anything, they started rolling snowballs again.

Satisfied with my completed snowman, I watched the two of them still engaged in their power struggle even while rolling snow.

When Asher and Yan finished making new snowballs, the servant stacked them again this time too.

"You made a good one."

I smiled and patted both brats on the head. Yan, who I'd been living with and petting constantly, grinned familiarly, but Asher's eyes went round with surprise.

"Now, we made a snowman together, so you two should get along and be friends."

At my words, both of them subtly avoided eye contact. They didn't seem to have even the slightest desire to become friends.

'Why do they hate each other so much?'

In the original story, they were inseparable best friends. Of course, there was a strong possibility that the relationship had changed because I'd inserted myself in the middle, and since I hadn't detailed their childhood, maybe they'd get along later...

Either way, the one suffering was me, stuck between them.

As my expression gradually twisted, the two of them glanced at me nervously, then grabbed each other's hands with utterly disgusted faces.

From the looks of things, it seemed like the three of us would be meeting up often from now on, and I had a strong premonition that each time I'd have to babysit two little kids.

Sort of like watching younger cousins or nieces and nephews on holidays.

When the vision of my near future crystallized, I secretly wiped away tears. Having to babysit two kids at once.

'My terrible fate.'

While I was distracted for a moment, the two of them hurriedly dropped each other's hands and came to stand on either side of me, each grabbing one of my hands.

As the tug-of-war started again, I scrunched up my face.

'I should've just wished out loud for these two to get along.'

I should've shouted it loud enough for everyone to hear. In the end, I half-gave-up and let them pull me whichever way they wanted. At least they weren't pulling hard enough to actually hurt.

Yan seemed quite heated—his face flushed red as he huffed and released my hand.

Then he approached Asher and shoved him. Asher apparently hadn't expected Yan to push him—he stumbled backward and landed hard on his bottom.

In the midst of it, Asher hurriedly let go of my hand, worried I'd get dragged down with him.

"Rayan!"

When I called his name instead of his nickname and scolded him, Rayan flinched backward in surprise. Seeing that reaction, I covered my mouth with both hands.

'I messed up.'

No matter how surprised I was, I shouldn't have yelled at Rayan, who until recently couldn't even lift his head. Yan, who I'd thought was getting a little better, dropped his head completely again.

"I—I'm sorry for yelling. But you can't push your friend. So..."

"I'm sorry."

"..."

"I'm sorry."

I couldn't tell who Yan's apology was directed at. Seeing him like that, I bit my lip hard.

Truly, I wanted to punch my past self.

Once Yan had lowered his head, he repeated "I'm sorry" like a parrot.

Roxana and Nanny took him back to the mansion to calm him down first.

Julian, who'd been watching Yan with a serious expression, said he had something to discuss for a moment, told us to keep playing, and left with Charlotte.

Once Rayan left, I covered my face with my hands. My gloves were damp with melted snow.

"Tilly, are you okay?"

When Asher, the actual victim, ended up being the one watching my reaction worriedly, my guilt grew even heavier. But I couldn't show it to the concerned Asher.

"What about you, Asher? You're not hurt anywhere, are you?"

"No, I'm fine. But that kid..."

Asher trailed off and glanced at me. Yan was the one who did wrong and I was the one who made a mistake, so I didn't understand why Asher was making that expression. After hesitating for a moment, Asher asked me:

"...Do you want me to be friends with him?"

At the unexpected question, I frowned. Was this because I'd told them to be friends earlier?

'Of course I'd like them to be friends, but...'

Asher still seemed bound by what he was supposed to do. With my gloves still on, I placed both hands on Asher's cheeks.

Startled by the cold, Asher's eyes went round.

"I told you, Asher. Put what you like ahead of what you're supposed to do."

At those words, Asher smiled brightly. It was a smile like he'd known I'd say that all along.

"Then I want to go make up with him."

"...Make up? Why? Do you like Yan?"

"Actually, I didn't like him much until earlier, but now that I understand why he did it, I think we can be friends."

"You understand?"

"Yeah! It felt like you were being taken away from me, so I didn't like it. But when I think about it, even if we fight, that doesn't mean I get to keep you, and you'd just leave both of us behind anyway."

'Correct answer, sub-male lead.'

In the original story too, Asher was the type who wouldn't even say "I like you" to Royna for Yan's sake.

Top tier among the pushover characters I'd created. No wonder readers complained about the waste and begged to have him if no one else could.

"My sweet boy."

"If I'm sweet, pat my head."

He must've liked it when I patted his head earlier without thinking—Asher shoved his head toward me.

I thoroughly messed up Asher's golden hair, which looked like solidified honey, turning it into a wild tangle.

"Still, Asher, you don't need to be too nice to everyone. You'll become a pushover that way."

"What's a pushover?"

"Someone who gives away their liver and gallbladder."

"Isn't that okay?"

"Of course it's not okay. How would you live without a liver and gallbladder?"

"What are a liver and gallbladder?"

"Things inside your body. You die without them. Well, you don't die without a gallbladder, but... anyway! You don't need to be the one who goes to make up first. Especially when Yan's the one who did wrong this time."

"...So you're saying not to be a good person?"

"Being a good person is fine, Asher. But distinguish between the people and situations where you want to be good. Someone who's just nice without that distinction is called a pushover."

"So being a pushover is only okay in front of you?"

"That's not what I meant..."

The explanation was apparently too difficult for Asher, who was still young. In the first place, a good person and a pushover were different things, but I'd just told him not to be too nice thinking he wouldn't understand the difference, and that seemed to have caused a problem.

Clutching my head in distress, I skipped any further explanation and nodded.

"...Fine. Be a pushover only in front of me. I'll stop you when I tell you not to do something."

"Okay! Then from now on I'll be Tilly's pushover."

I had no idea what he was so happy about, but Asher proudly declared he'd become a pushover.

'Ugh, what am I going to do with this stubborn child.'

"Don't say you'll be a pushover in front of other people."

"Okay, the only person I'll be a pushover for is you, Tilly. Because aside from Mother and Father, I like you best."

"Yes, yes. I know. But even if someone you like more than me appears someday, don't be a pushover."

"Hahaha, it's fine."

Asher's laughter was clear, but to my eyes he just looked foolish.

"It's not fine, you know?"

"No, it's fine. That won't happen."

'...Does he mean there won't be anyone he likes more than me, or that he won't become a pushover?'

I thought about asking which one he meant, but looking at Asher's face as he continued to smile, I somehow felt reluctant to ask.

When I just laughed vaguely, Asher said he'd go make up with Yan.

"Let's go together."

"No. Tilly, wait here. I'll make up with him and bring Yan back. Then the three of us can build a snowman together!"

"...Okay. Let's build a snowman together."

"I'll be right back."

I shouted at Asher as he ran toward the mansion not to run or he'd fall. Asher waved his hand as if to say he was fine.

Once Asher went inside the mansion and I was finally alone, the sigh I'd been holding in burst out.

"Haah..."

'This isn't the time to celebrate just because I got rid of some tutors.'

Yan's time in the Empire was only a year—far too short to change anything.

While he was at the ducal estate, people wouldn't dare treat Yan carelessly, but it would be useless once he returned to the kingdom.

I'd said I'd overturn everything, but really nothing had changed at all.

A year is a short time. The year might end before I even decide what to do about Yan.

If the reason I was born into this world was to save someone, and if that someone was Yan, wasn't I making a huge mistake?

Wasn't I missing a critically important opportunity?

'Someone, anyone, please tell me what I should do.'

There was no one anywhere who could answer my question.