IWBAACTWITOS Chapter 8

'Ah, I got too worked up over a little kid.'

I sighed as I looked out the carriage window, recalling what had happened with Ash. At my sigh, Julian, who had been looking at documents, raised his head.

"What did you play today?"

"Ash carried me on his back."

"Really? Is our Tilly happy to have an older brother?"

At the word 'older brother,' I grimaced.

"Why is he my older brother?"

"Because his birthday is a few months earlier than our Tilly's?"

"It's just that his birthday is a little earlier."

When I answered snippily, Julian chuckled as if something was very funny.

"Why are you laughing?"

"A long time ago, Dad also fought with Ash's dad about who was the older brother."

"Who's the older brother?"

"Of course Dad is the older brother."

"Is Dad's birthday earlier?"

"Of course. There's a whole month's difference."

At the mention of one month, I laughed because it was so absurd. Unlike Ash and me, who have more than half a year's difference, fighting over older and younger brother status with just one month's difference was ridiculous. When I laughed, Julian seemed embarrassed and scratched his cheek.

"Does Tilly not like Ash?"

"No, I like him."

"Why?"

I answered Julian with a face that said 'why are you asking something so obvious.'

"He's cute."

"...Our Tilly really takes after her mother."

"Really?"

"Yeah, saying things like that with a serious face is exactly the same."

At Julian's words, I chuckled and thought of Ash.

Aegis.

The name of the most famous shield in Greek and Roman mythology. Aegis was a character who chose to willingly become a shield for people, and furthermore, for those he loved.

At the end of the story I wrote, he becomes a true emperor.

From the first time we met, Ash always smiled brightly. He was kind, polite, and upright.

While it was largely due to his nature, it was also because he grew up in an environment where he had no choice but to be that way. He received many people's expectations and tried to live up to those expectations.

'It's not necessarily a bad thing.'

But Ash was still just a little kid who couldn't even distinguish whether he really wanted something or not, what he liked or disliked.

A prince character who seemed like he'd appear in fairy tales—that was the sub-male lead I created, not the current Ash.

Of course, Ash would someday have to become my sub-male lead, and the environment he was in was the process of creating that sub-male lead.

Why Ash had no choice but to become the perfect Prince, why he could be kind to everyone and upright in everything.

And why he loved the male and female leads so much. Thus making the choice to die together for them.

'It's frustrating.'

The more precious things a person has, the more they try to protect them. To make Ash an extremely altruistic shield, I created an environment where he had no choice but to be loved a lot and love a lot.

What should I, an extremely selfish human being, do about his problems while he's still small and young? Should I leave him alone for the sake of the original story? Or should I tell him it's okay to be a little selfish?

'When I can't even shake off my own frustration, can I shake off Ash's frustration?'

"Tilly!"

At Julian's call, I came out of my thoughts and met his gaze. Somehow, the people around me rarely gave me time to fall into thought.

"What, Dad?"

"The portrait painted recently was completed. Her Majesty the Empress sent one to our house too."

"Portrait? Oh, that..."

It seemed the one painted when I danced with Ash recently was finished. Anyway, that would be used for the doting parents' fan activities, so I didn't pay much attention to it.

When Julian started talking about how cute I looked in the painting, I turned my head away.

Checking outside the window, we were passing through the main gate of the duke's mansion. However, the duke's mansion was very large, so even after passing the main gate, we had to go another 5 minutes by carriage.

In other words, I had to listen to Julian's chatter for another 5 minutes. Even though I could listen with one ear and let it out the other, Julian's chatter was tiring, so I just covered my ears. Honestly, covering my ears with my hands doesn't have much effect on soundproofing.

I was just sending Julian a signal that I didn't want to listen. However, even though I covered my ears, Julian continued chattering without a care.

"So Russ, I mean His Majesty the Emperor, Ash, and our Tilly had a debate about who was cuter and prettier."

I didn't want to hear about two doting uncles fighting over bragging about their children. Because for the subjects of that bragging, it was nothing but shameful.

"Dad was almost winning, but Russ insisted it was invalid unless he confirmed Tilly's cuteness with his own eyes. He said it was unfair because he couldn't meet you when Tilly first came to the imperial palace last time. Really, who told him to get scolded by Her Majesty the Empress and get banned from approaching? Anyway, since Russ was so stubborn, we decided to meet as families this weekend."

At the mention of meeting as families, I scrunched up my face. Even though I was already home, I wanted to go home even more intensely.

Philius looked intently at the portrait still leaning against one wall, unable to decide where to hang it, while holding Aegis who had fallen asleep after crying.

During the day, he had a verbal fight with Julian over whose child was prettier, looking at this portrait.

At that time, he was only focused on Aegis's smile in the painting, but now his gaze kept going to Thalia's smile. The more he looked, the more Thalia's smile seemed somehow different from Aegis's purely innocent smile.

"Lottie, what kind of child do you think the princess is?"

"An angel."

At Charlotte's answer without hesitation, Philius chuckled. She was certainly as pretty as an angel, just like Julian.

"Honestly, I had no expectations for the princess at all."

"But you brought up the engagement talk?"

"That was really something I said without much thought."

Charlotte snorted as if she still hadn't gotten over her anger from that time. Philius laid Aegis on the bed and began massaging Charlotte's shoulders to appease her anger. Charlotte arranged Aegis's blonde hair and turned her gaze to the portrait Philius had been looking at.

'I thought my son was the most mature child in the world, but that wasn't the case.'

It wasn't long ago that Charlotte realized there was something wrong with the situation surrounding Aegis.

To be precise, it was when she first arranged a gathering with noble children Aegis's age to make suitable friends for him. High noble families often did this to cultivate social skills.

She had organized a tea party with a very light heart, selecting people with children from among those she met frequently.

Originally, she wanted to invite Thalia as well, but at that time Roxana was giving birth to her second child, so it was postponed.

Aegis had appeared at official events several times before. Each time, he showed himself to be polite while maintaining the dignity of royalty as he had learned.

So people around him said he was an ideal prince. Until hearing those words, she had been very proud.

She thought there would be no problem with a gathering with peers rather than adults, and as expected, Aegis played well with the noble children.

It was a very successful tea party, and that evening during dinner, Charlotte asked Aegis.

"Which friend did our Ash like the most?"

"The Trovil Count family was the most suitable."

Charlotte asked about the friend he liked, but Aegis's answer was about a suitable family. Moreover, Count Trovil was one of Philius's advisors.

From Aegis's perspective, someone politically suitable that Philius kept close. Philius and Charlotte both froze upon hearing that answer.

'Huh?'

Was Aegis judging the children's parents in that situation of playing hide-and-seek? Had he not really enjoyed running around but only smiled because he had to?

When that doubt arose, Charlotte was able to think about Aegis again.

She was aware that he was a mature child. She didn't lack the desire for him to act a bit more like a child his age, but since he would someday become emperor, she thought being mature was better than being too childish.

The maturity Charlotte thought Aegis had was the extent of behaving politely to people around him.

But behind that politeness, Aegis was building political calculations. Such things were needed much later.

'He's only five years old now.'

Aegis was growing up to meet the expectations around him. But those expectations could become pressure on Aegis and might even close off his possibilities.

Charlotte and Philius began worrying after that day. Aegis was already constraining himself within the framework of being a prince.

They made him naturally interact with peers from various social classes, not just nobles, but the result was the same.

'How about having him meet Princess Remetio?'

They thought if he met a child in the most similar situation but different from him, something might change.

From what they heard, unlike Aegis, when Thalia was invited to meet peers, she either ran away or caused so much trouble that she was kicked out.

And Charlotte was able to be certain the moment she first met Thalia.

This child was an angel sent from heaven who would change Aegis.

'How can such a pretty child exist?'

All children are pretty, but Thalia was especially pretty. She was the spitting image of Julian, who was rumored to have god-given beauty, and when looking into those purple eyes, his heart naturally trembled.

Charlotte, who had been trying various ways to have a daughter as her second child but had no news for several years, couldn't help but smile whenever she met Thalia.

And Aegis was Charlotte's son. Unlike with other children, it was obvious that Aegis liked Thalia so much he didn't know what to do with himself.

Although Aegis hadn't changed much, she thought it was enough that he liked Thalia.

Until tonight, before Aegis came to the bedroom.

"Tilly seems to hate me."

"Did Tilly say that?"

At that question, Aegis shook his head and told them exactly what he had talked about with Thalia. It seemed Thalia had also noticed Aegis's problems and was troubled.

While Philius and Charlotte were at a loss about how to explain this, Aegis finally burst into tears.

Unless he heard directly from Thalia that she liked him, Aegis seemed ready to keep crying.

They barely managed to comfort him by saying he could ask again when he met Thalia on the weekend. Seeing Aegis cry for the first time in a long while, Philius seemed to fall into sentiment for a moment.

"Were you similar when you were young?"

"Well, the situation was so messed up that I had fewer expectations than Ash. It was an empire in name only."

"...I see."

"But I understand what feelings my parents had when they looked at me. They were always sorry to me."

Thinking of the late imperial couple who always smiled at him, Philius swallowed his bitterness and hugged Charlotte.

"Shall we sleep now?"

"Yes, let's all sleep together for the first time in a while."