LADBITW Chapter 4

After servants from the castle had come and gone—

On the second floor of the white house where the widow from Sevitas brought by Grand Duke Axias stayed—

A slender candle flame flickered before a memorial tablet inscribed with a small child's name.

Lietta sat before it for a long time, soul-lost.

And prayed for a long time.

After the night passed with nothing visible but the dimly lit candle flame, and the moon that had risen to midheaven drifted westward, Lietta finally laid her body on the bed.

Cool but warm bedding enfolded her.

Her bed.

Not a bed meant for someone to take her in…

A bed solely for her to rest and sleep in.

Lietta thought absently of the man who'd fished her out and cast her onto his land—the empire's most savage man.

Killian Axias.

The coldblooded who'd beheaded his own brothers…

Who allegedly killed intoxicated women if they didn't satisfy him.

That madman tyrant with such vicious rumors.

Was that truly him?

Lietta felt the cold bedding gradually warm as she thought of butler Ern's words.

"Miss Tristy may not know the Master well, but the Master never holds women who don't wish to be held."

His natural manner suggested he well knew she would misunderstand Killian.

Respect and affection for his master showed clearly on the butler's gently smiling face.

"If he wasn't going to hold me, why did he bring me?"

At her foolish question, the butler had smiled kindly and answered.

"Perhaps the Master pitied you, Miss Tristy."

Lietta exhaled shallowly and covered her eyes with the back of her hand.

Atop the emptiness of being the only one left alive in a world where husband and child had departed, and the heavy guilt—

Relief at being alive felt so wretched it made her weep.

Tears fell silently beneath her hand, arriving late.

She'd thought she'd let go of any thought of living.

Countless people had called her pitiable.

Yet the only one who'd extended a hand to her was the empire's most notoriously coldblooded man.

After a full day and night had passed and recovered, as the eastern sky paled with early dawn light, Lietta finally stirred her body awake, staggering.

The faint dawn light and breeze entering through the open window were peaceful, though not particularly bright. Having sat for so long without eating, just rising made darkness flicker before her eyes. Lietta braced herself against the wall, waiting for the dizziness to pass.

'Now that I'm comfortable, I have leisure to indulge in self-pity.'

She'd sat day and night before her daughter's memorial tablet lighting candles until the tinderbox and candles she'd packed in her small bag ran out in less than a day. Only then did she think to rise.

Lietta reproached herself for having sprawled too long and began moving by instinct.

Spending time blankly doing nothing was a luxury belonging to the time she'd waited for death as the lord's burial goods.

She wasn't waiting for death, yet staying shut indoors sprawling felt wrong—habits ingrained over long years made it impossible to adapt. Lietta moved almost unconsciously, shuffling.

Too much time had passed to excuse losing herself by not accepting reality. Having survived, she needed to gather her wits quickly.

So she could light candles and pray for her daughter to find her husband properly…

Commoners had to work to survive. Whatever she did, she had to keep moving constantly to endure spring famine or whatever hardships might come. Even a long mourning period was a luxury.

They said they'd provide living expenses, but she couldn't simply accept them idly. It was spring, when food was expensive.

Though spring's hardships wouldn't apply to Grand Duke Axias, for commoner Lietta, financial help during this season felt even heavier.

The thought that she already owed a debt of life too heavy to bear made Lietta anxious.

She thought that if she organized her luggage with her sluggish body, day would soon break, but she hadn't packed much since she never expected to settle and live somewhere, so it ended quickly. Outside remained dark.

I really brought nothing.

Still, it was impressive she'd managed to pack her daughter's memorial tablet and tinderbox amid everything.

Having barely moved yet already exhausted, Lietta stared blankly at the extinguished incense burner. Then looked out the window again.

It was still too early and dangerous to go out and buy things.

She began wandering the house again, moving her weak body like a ghost.

Perhaps there were fire-starting tools somewhere in the house?

There was a belief that people who'd crossed to the other side of Rodomus could properly receive the gods' guidance and meet those who'd gone before only if people in this world who'd loved the departed lit fires in their memory.

Though she'd spent over ten years in a convent and seen countless times how such superstitions were exploited for profit, when it became her own affair, even Lietta found herself foolishly clinging to it.

The Sevitas convent where Lietta spent her childhood claimed that on every month's dark night when demons ran wild, one must light fires all night and offer rituals, buy certain talismans, absolutely hear priests' blessings—constantly adding flesh to those beliefs to make money.

Fortunately, having lived long as a nun, Lietta could offer prayers, blessings, and rituals herself. Still, the symbolic rite of lighting candles was something she couldn't omit.

Lietta moved, marshalling her trembling, weak body.

As Lietta opened drawers and cupboards and wardrobes in the living room and bedrooms, she was somewhat surprised to find more things equipped than expected.

Far more items were furnished without lack than had been in the house where she'd lived.

There were even simple preserved foods she could eat. Dry biscuits that wouldn't spoil even stored long.

Only then did she feel hunger in her long-empty stomach. Lietta pulled out the entire biscuit tin, cradled it in one arm, and continued rummaging through cupboards and drawers while eating.

Having starved so long her stomach was damaged, the dry food entering quickly made nausea rise and she retched once or twice, but her hand still reached for biscuits again.

It didn't take long for Lietta to find matches in a drawer, her eyes widening as she clutched them tight.

Premium matches used only for important events even at the convent. Right beside them she found a lamp filled generously with oil.

If she kept the lamp lit, she wouldn't have to worry about the candle flame that kept going out due to the poor wick.

No, perhaps there were candles too? With matches and a lamp, it was stranger not to have candles.

As expected, after not wandering long, Lietta found candles in a nearby drawer and picked them up with delight. Premium candles made of beeswax.

She hurried back to the altar—precisely, the small dresser where she'd placed the memorial tablet and incense burner.

Lietta crouched before the memorial tablet again.

Lighting the premium candles with matches and gazing quietly at the burning flame, Lietta forgot to pray and remained blank for a long time before finally chewing and swallowing the biscuit in her mouth.

The tin containing biscuits had already emptied by half.

It's absurd to be hungry in this situation. Self-mocking that food could go down, then—

Pfft. The lips that had been sneering at herself crumpled, and soon her head dropped.

Of all things to be happy about…

Not happy because the cooking she made was eaten deliciously, smearing lips and cheeks and nose everywhere; not because the pretty clothes she dressed her daughter in became a mess instantly, making the child's tearful face adorable; not because the way she mumbled in her sleep was lovable—

But happy about good candles before the memorial tablet. Tears came at how ridiculous she was.

She'd thought she would die, but she lived.

She'd thought she'd become a noble's plaything, but she was released.

Still, sorrow was sorrow.

Chewing and swallowing tear-mixed biscuits silently, Lietta thought of her husband's grave left in a distant land and her daughter child for whom she couldn't even make a grave.

Not even two months had passed since losing her child. Yet here was the mother who'd lost her child, relieved to be alive, chewing food.

Of all things to be happy about, happy that the candles to place before the memorial tablet were premium.

The throat that choked swallowing hardtack wasn't only from lack of water.

She didn't know when she'd fallen asleep, but woke to someone knocking at the door.

Bright midday sunlight and breeze entered peacefully through the open window.

Again that dull thump thump, the sound of knocking.

Fear struck first.

Sevitas knights? Guards?

No. No. This is Axias.

Had Grand Duke Axias changed his mind?

Opening the door cautiously while tense, Lietta's face went blank discovering a matronly middle-aged woman and a couple who seemed about ten years older than Lietta, though younger than the woman—a man and woman.

"Hello."

The middle-aged woman standing in front greeted her first. The man immediately followed, almost overlapping.

"Oh! It's true. The house owner has arrived. Wow, such a beauty! I'm Martin. Call me Uncle Martin! Or just Martin works too."

Before the energetic greeting could register in Lietta's head, the woman beside him smacked the man's back and chided him.

"Really, so tactless! I'm Nella. Don't mind this guy's nonsense."

The middle-aged woman who'd smiled warmly at them held out a plate while smiling.

A sweet, savory aroma wafted up.

"Welcome to Axias. I wonder if you like apple pie?"

Lietta finally realized they were her new neighbors coming to give an ordinary welcoming greeting.

"Ah, th-thank you…"

Lietta received the plate vacantly while stammering thanks. They smiled broadly, waiting for her next words.

After a long pause collecting herself, Lietta realized she was this house's owner and didn't know what to do as she hesitantly stepped back from the doorway.

When alone she'd rummaged and wandered as if it were naturally her house, yet now facing other people having to invite them in as if this were her house felt too unfamiliar.

'Ah, right. This was a situation where I should invite them in.'

"Ah, um… Would you like to come in? …Just a moment. The house… hasn't been organized yet."

Lietta awkwardly welcomed them while stepping backward in confusion.

She turned around hurriedly.

The place she looked back at was so perfectly clean and tidy it was embarrassing she'd said it wasn't organized.

Natural. It was a new house and Lietta had brought almost nothing.

Fortunately, a dining table with four chairs was visible in the living room near the kitchen.

"This, this way……."

Lietta awkwardly guided the guests and set the plate on the dining table.

The middle-aged woman who'd given her the apple pie smiled and introduced herself.

"I live in the house next door. Call me Aunt Penil."

The two who'd already stated their names added more.

"We run M&N General Store at that intersection ahead. Martin and Nella's General Store."

"Nice to meet you, new neighbor miss!"

"Ah……."

Her head belatedly told her this was a situation where she should state her name.

Lietta finally gathered her wits and bowed her head in greeting.

"Ah, hello. I'm Li, Lietta."

"Lilietta? Pretty name!"

"Ah, no! It's Lietta. Lietta, Tristy."

"Lietta! That name's pretty too!"

Whatever he said, his voice was booming and energetic as if emphasizing every word forcefully.

Though Lietta hadn't said anything herself, she felt breathless as if infected by his energy, holding her breath and floundering, then another beat late became flustered that the guests who'd entered were standing awkwardly, so she hurriedly offered them chairs.

The guests sat around the dining table smiling broadly.

Only after hastily taking out dishes and plates to place on the table with the apple pie did she realize—

She had nothing decent to serve as drinks.

Lietta turned toward the guests in dismay.

"I'm, I'm so sorry. After you came… There's nothing to drink in the house. Ju-just wait a moment please? I'll go out quickly and buy something."

'Money. Where did I put the money?' Frantically retracing her thoughts, Nella smiled broadly and waved her hand.

"Don't feel burdened. We're fine with just water!"

Lietta panicked again.

"Th-that's, there's no water. Ah, could you possibly tell me where the nearest well or water source is nearby?"

The three people's eyes widened.

"Oh my, hasn't it been two days since you moved here? How can you still have no water in the house? Did you eat?"

Nella turned her head sharply and pushed Martin's back as if hitting it.

"Martin, go out and buy some milk."

"Ow! Geez!"

Martin reacted irritably at being hit in the same spot as before.

Aunt Penil studied Lietta's complexion and made a worried face.

"Goodness. Look how haggard your face is. You must have been so busy moving and organizing you lost your mind! But we do everything to live, so you should eat while doing it."

Nella's eyes went round.

"Were you that busy? You couldn't do anything?"

Only then did Martin notice Lietta's complexion was wan and bent his eyebrows into an upside-down V.

"Huh. We waited before coming thinking we'd be a bother since you'd be busy… Maybe it would've been better if we came earlier to help? Was it very hard?"

Aunt Penil actually gestured toward Lietta and rose.

"Come out with us. I'll show you where the well is."

Nella clapped her hands together and caught the words.

"Ah, that's better. You haven't gone outside at all? You probably don't know where the market is either?"

Nella jumped up too. Martin had already risen.

The conversation flowed so rapidly there wasn't a gap to interject a single word. Lietta instinctively began flailing urgently, raising and lowering her hands in the air, hurrying to adapt to their fast tempo.

"Ah, th-thank you. Just a moment. The key……. Where did I put the key?"

Unable to find the key, when Lietta tried to go upstairs flustered, Nella grabbed her hand saying it was fine to just go.

In a posture that became half arm-in-arm, Lietta looked blankly at Nella who'd linked arms with her, blinking. Nella grinned affably.

"It's fine. Even going out without locking. First time in Axias? There are almost no thieves in Axias."

Aunt Penil, who'd already gone ahead and opened the door, continued the words.

"Well, you should lock the door at night when going out though. But when it's bright like this, it's okay to leave it open a bit. Oh my, but this young lady should be careful of thieves other than night thieves. Lietta, you're truly a beauty."

"P-pardon?"

Nella reached out with a pitying face and stroked Lietta's gaunt cheek once.

"But your complexion is bad. Did you sleep? You have to eat well and sleep well. You're still young."

At the sudden passing warmth, Lietta blinked vacantly.

"Your skin's rough. It'll ruin such good skin."

"Still, you're just beautiful. We have good cream that came into our general store—want me to give it to you as a gift?"

"Nella. Don't touch and push yourself on someone you just met."

"Oops, sorry. I did it without thinking."

Lietta was dragged out holding hands, swept away as if caught in rapids.

Even if this had been an elaborately arranged kidnapping to steal someone's soul, there was no excuse for the stupidity of being dragged out so obediently—but there was no leisure to reach that thought.

Lietta was swept along in confusion, unable to refuse, dragged away by the arms of these vibrant people.