RAMHM Chapter 115

While I'm Still Inside You

The kiss was urgent.

Pushed back and back and back until my spine hit the door—click.

The slightly open door closed completely.

I tried to turn my head, startled, but he caught it and captured my lips again.

The large hand rubbing my back traveled up my spine to my nape, casually gripping it.

Unable to find buttons, those desperate fingers simply tore straight through the thin fabric at the back of my neck.

His hands—attempting to rip but slowing intermittently as if catching reason—contrasted with his lips that still moved frantically.

"Rhoan, not here..."

"Mm."

"The bed, let's go to the bed..."

"...It's dark there."

The canopied bed was shadowed and dim.

"I want to see. Everything."

His voice, thick with desire, dripped between our briefly parted lips. I pushed away from him and fled toward the bed.

His gleaming eyes flashed like a predator momentarily losing its prey.

I pulled the blanket over myself to hide the body exposed by my ruined dress.

"You—you take yours off first."

He'd already revealed his muscled torso completely, yet I couldn't overcome my embarrassment.

Rhodness walked slowly into the canopy's shadow. Kneeling at the bed's edge, he laughed low and dragged his thumb across his wet lips.

"...As you wish."

Gulp.

I swallowed dryly as Rhodness, shrouded in dimness, unfastened his belt buckle without hesitation.

The click-click sound was unbearably provocative.

Seeing him instantly stripped down to only his lower undergarments made my face burn.

The volume straining against the fabric was incomparable to what I'd felt through his trousers earlier—I squeezed my eyes shut.

"No, no just come here..."

I clutched the blanket tightly.

"...As commanded."

Rustle, rustle.

As the white bedding whispered at my ear, his hand reached for the blanket I was clutching.

"It's in the way."

The blanket was stolen in one motion. The moment I opened my eyes at the empty feeling, my lips were devoured again.

I fumbled across the bed searching for my dress—already completely torn at the back and stripped off by his hands—when his large hand covered mine and brought it forward to him.

At the vividly felt sensation, I flinched and tried to pull away, but his breath against me grew rougher.

"Don't pull away..."

The thin fabric swollen with enormous volume pressed distinctly against my palm, asserting its existence.

When I startled again, Rhodness added with lips soaked wet:

"It's yours now."

Compared to the devouring kisses, the touch that followed was infinitely gentle and careful.

As I surrendered my body to the rustling bedding, the breath that had been ravaging my mouth moved to my neck.

Naturally my hands went to his cleanly gleaming hair.

Each time his lips rubbed and savored the tender flesh as if tasting it, I responded by threading through his hair.

The hot, wet sensation that wandered inside my mouth wrapped around and shook my entire body.

The ceiling spun round and round. A sensation I'd never felt in my life split through my body.

I stopped breathing and reached toward him as if begging for mercy. Rhodness immediately responded by taking my lips.

He repeated low murmurs ceaselessly, biting and swallowing and consuming my lips.

I embraced that broad back that had imprisoned me completely in his shadow as if it were my entire world, digging in my nails.

"...I don't know how I ever thought I could live celibate for life."

That terribly low voice slithered into my reason-stripped ears like a snake.

"Rhoan, Rhoan I..."

"Like this... I want to die while I'm still inside you."

Our lips met again and Rhodness, his large hand gripping the back of my head, entangled and devoured me like a ruthless conqueror.

The sensation of his writhing back with each movement traveled up my arms to tickle my heart.

When mixing hot breaths his movements became infinitely tender—but conversely, when he gently licked around my mouth and spoke sweet words, he turned rough to the point of ferocity.

Each time I released breath like a scream, Rhodness's lips came immediately to swallow the sound.

That voice growling like an angry beast scraped through his entire throat and invaded my ears, thrusting wildly.

Time flowed like a river.

The dusky sunset that had illuminated us was nowhere—night sky covered us like a blanket.

Exhaling hot breaths, I colored my vision with that dizzy hue for the countless time.

Throughout that helplessly passing time, my mind became a blank white canvas and tears fell sideways.

Every nerve in my body burned crackle-crackle.

I'd already exploded like becoming one giant firework in that bursting sensation.

Unfamiliar tears of either joy or pleasure rolled down one side again.

Rhodness, spine still tensed, moved his lips to the falling tears with a deep sigh.

The moment I felt that hot, wet flesh lick away even those tears—I lost consciousness like a puppet with cut strings.

Dream or reality?

The massive body that had crushed me completely enveloped me, whispering ceaselessly.

"...Adrienne."

That rough, hoarse voice was as low and sunk as mine.

"...Rienne."

I love you.

You're my breath, you're my heart.

I'll never let you go. I'll hold you tight and never let anyone take you from me.

I heard it dreamlike, but I think that was the content.

At that hour, the Crown Princess's palace.

Duke Castagna watched Doris sipping alcohol during mourning with an incredulous look.

Seeing his daughter who'd already thrown off mourning clothes to wear a white dress made even his skull tingle.

"...The Second Prince is absolutely not acceptable."

"I don't want anyone but Rhodness."

"In terms of looks, the Ninth Prince is just as good. Even if succession order is higher, if the Emperor puts weight behind Prince Epero—the current Empress's son—no one can object. Especially, will the Crown Prince faction's forces let Rhodness go so easily? That bastard isn't someone who'll bow to people like Bardenaldo did!"

Duke Castagna's voice was quite firm.

"Don't think foolish thoughts, Doris. At least you're gaining sympathy votes because you have a good image with the dead Crown Prince. There's no child between you two, so you can remarry."

"Are you telling me to give up the Empress position like this?"

"No. What are you talking about?"

A vile smile hung on Duke Castagna's lips as he looked her over with dissatisfaction.

"Don't you have your younger sister?"

Doris's hand—tossing back remaining alcohol and arranging her disheveled hair—froze stiffly.

"...What?"

"No matter how much sympathy you gain, whether the Second Prince becomes Crown Prince or gets pushed to the frontier. Would he take his full brother's wife?"

"So now you're saying to give twelve-year-old Raphaélla to Rhodness?!"

"No. To Epero."

"Father!"

Duke Castagna stood up abruptly as if unwilling to say more. Doris's eyes widened as she stood following him.

"Right now you can't have Epero. Unless the law changes immediately. Whether you remarry some wealthy imperial relative or remarry foreign royalty, I'll use my influence, so restrain yourself!"

He left the reception room without even listening to Doris's response.

Left alone in an instant, Doris clenched her fists at the surging sense of betrayal.

As Nora pushed her body through the open door gap while reading the mood, Doris's bloodshot eyes turned there.

"Summon Count Raelon immediately, immediately!"

At the ominous intensity, Nora hurriedly closed the door and disappeared.

"Who gave permission to give Raphaélla the Empress position?"

Doris's index finger began scraping the hangnail on her thumb scratch-scratch.

I might have tossed and turned in my sleep.

Unlike the fluffy blanket covered later, the bed sheets soaked wet from torment that hadn't ended even past dawn felt somewhat unpleasant.

When I tried to escape the firm arms binding me like vines—that dizzy sensation wrapped around my entire body again.

The hot breath settling on my body already heavy as waterlogged cotton was unbearable.

Rhodness exhausted me until I couldn't move a finger, tormenting me until I couldn't even think of escaping his embrace before finally putting on a gentle lamb's mask and holding me.

The bodies pressed together were too bare—it felt like his hot body temperature was transferring to me.

But my body tended toward cool, so until just before light seeped into the bedroom, I had no choice but to burrow into his embrace.

In the midst of mental fog from being tormented all night, when I lifted heavy eyelids—over his massive shoulder I saw bedroom scenery very familiar to me.

Walls covered in deep green. The huge window I couldn't even walk to and open myself. A few antique furniture pieces. My bedroom when I was Adrienne Trovika.

"...Adrienne."

My heart seemed to squeeze at memories briefly surfacing.

When the blanket's rustling sound and his breath landed crosswise at my ear—a strange sense of stability covered my body.

Everything was the same, yet simultaneously everything was different.

The desolate space where I'd shared breath with Novian Trovika, where there was nothing but waiting.

The space where I'd died and dragged Novian to hell. In that space, I was with Rhodness...

"Adrienne..."

Stray thoughts flew away instantly.

That sunken voice tickled my nape. The moment I flinched and curled my body, lips followed immediately.

The lips that had been trying to go lower touched my shoulder blade when I covered my chest with both hands and turned my back to him.

"Ah."

"I love you."

"Rhoan, I think it's morning..."

"I know."

He pulled me strongly from behind. When that ridiculously healthy body pressed against me, I answered trembling slightly.

"If we do it now... I might really die."

"...Alright."

He bent his body fully from behind as if reluctant, biting and licking my earlobe.

When I hunched my shoulders, the large hand that had burrowed between my armpits gripped my chin and turned it toward him.

Having completely hidden last night's ferocity, the world's most sweet breath invaded my mouth.

That's when—

Knock knock.

"My lady, an urgent message arrived."

As I pushed away the hand that wouldn't release me to the end, Yona—who'd never dreamed Rhodness was staying here—opened the door and came in, eyes widening.

"I, I..."

"Leave it and go."

At Rhodness's cold voice, Yona approached creaking like a broken clock, placed the letter on the bed, and escaped like an arrow.

I reached out and examined the letter.

Content that someone was inquiring to find me—or rather, Bliea.

From none other than Ellaconia.

And the moment I saw the name contained within, I froze stiffly.

Rhodness, still embracing me from behind, rested his chin on my shoulder to look at the letter.

"...Olivia Lucia?"

Rhodness's deeply submerged voice touched my ear softly.

"Do you know her?"

"Yes."

The blood that had burned hot all night inside my body cooled coldly.

Olivia Lucia.

It was my nanny's name.