RAMHM Chapter 36

There's No Help Without a Reason

A moment of silence flowed through the drawing room where gentle music had been playing.

"...Pardon?"

"Am I wrong?"

Doris tilted her head questioningly. Was it right to ask about the vacant Grand Duchess position while knowing my circumstances—presumptuous as that would be? Of course I neither wanted to become Grand Duchess nor was I in any position to do so. But...

Bliea wanted to become Grand Duchess.

Novian had definitely said so. While I gathered my thoughts on how to respond, Doris took several more sips of tea, then set her cup on the table.

"I think, in one corner of your heart, you've drawn a picture of a future with Grand Duke Trovika. Am I mistaken?"

Her face showed no malice whatsoever—I was momentarily at a loss for words. Did the Crown Princess know I was Novian's mistress when she asked? Did she know about Bliea's ridiculous dream as well?

"Didn't the Grand Duke tell you that you resemble his late wife?"

"!"

As expected, Doris was someone who knew my face.

"...His Grace hasn't said anything specifically."

I ground my teeth, struggling to regain my composure—feeling as though my shame had been exposed. Interest flickered across Doris's face.

"Because you truly resemble the late Grand Duchess so closely, he showed kindness he'd never normally imagine showing. That Iron-Blooded Chancellor, of all people."

Certainty dwelt in Doris's voice.

"I hear there's been frequent contact between the Acacia estate and the Grand Ducal estate recently. If my guess isn't wrong, the Grand Duke must certainly have personal feelings for you."

And her certainty seemed to have reasons behind it.

"...How do you know so much? Your Highness seems to know everything."

I widened my eyes slightly, pretending to be a bit surprised, asking as though fascinated. My wariness toward this woman—who'd guessed at Bliea and Novian's relationship based on resemblance to my original face—began rising sharply.

"I have eyes and ears even in the Grand Ducal estate."

Doris spoke as though it were nothing. But seeing her face bloom with a smile, I felt—just for a moment—as though my entire body had gone numb.

Eyes and ears belonging to Doris inside the Grand Ducal estate...?

The feeling struck powerfully that I'd met the ringleader of those demonic Grand Ducal estate servants who'd tormented me. I'd vaguely suspected the reason those servants could treat me so might be because they had solid backing. But hearing that possibility stated so openly was still startling.

"You must have heard the rumors. That Grand Duke Trovika's love for his wife was extreme—no, excessive."

So excessive he took a mistress.

Even frozen as I was, I quietly scoffed inwardly.

"With how extreme and excessive it was, I don't know if securing that position would be so easy. But if you become my person, I'll help you with that."

I had not the slightest interest in something like the Grand Duchess position. But if Doris would help me reach the Grand Ducal estate based on that assumption, such a misunderstanding was worth it.

"I'll do my utmost during my time as Your Highness's attendant to avoid disgracing the Imperial family."

There's no help without a reason.

I knew that very well. Presumably Doris also had some matter requiring my help—that's why she'd help me. Two years of subtle humiliation and abuse inflicted on me.

Whether all of it came from this woman's orders or not—I still knew nothing. I'd learn once I entered that den directly. Doris, seemingly satisfied with my answer, smiled like a peony in full bloom. I, too, smiled back, mirroring her expression.

Though I'd pretended composure, the moment I left the audience chamber I felt profound exhaustion. Like facing a massive mountain alone and emerging afterward—should I describe it that way? Once the quietly excited feeling faded, tension and fear wrapped around me.

If it's a position I can't refuse anyway, I have no choice but to do my utmost to use the situation.

Because all I have right now is Bliea's healthy body. Not wanting to linger any longer in the Crown Princess's palace, I quickened my steps—and found a large shadow cast across the entrance to the long corridor.

"...Your Imperial Highness?"

"It took longer than expected."

Rhodness, who'd been leaning his long body against the corridor wall, straightened his rigid posture.

"Quite a bit of time has passed... surely you haven't been waiting continuously since escorting me?"

"What kind of man leaves his partner behind?"

Despite his rigid face and flat tone, the content was nothing if not tender. When he approached and held out his hand as though for me to take, the anxiety that had been pulling at my feet seemed to flee far away.

Even if this man didn't know all my circumstances, the fact remained unchanged—he was the only ally who could give me strength right now. The fear and loneliness floating along my spine seemed to dissipate somewhat as well.

"Are you going to keep standing there like that?"

The sunset was falling. I was strangely comforted by this man who knew nothing. It almost felt as though this man was gently stroking the back of my head—still tingling from being struck hard. The sunset illuminating us, him waiting for me. Was it because he asked me nothing? My heart felt ticklish, and a tension different from what I'd felt with Doris crossed along my spine.

"This..."

I hesitated briefly, then pulled out the cookie package I'd been carrying in my dress. I'd made them on impulse, but once I actually faced him, I hadn't been able to find the right timing to give them. Rhodness only stared silently at my cookie package—crumpled wrapping paper and ribbon.

"I thought it would be better to give this in front of Sir Jimskehr, or in front of more people, but..."

"......"

My hands—which hadn't trembled even before Doris—shook slightly. I couldn't look at Rhodness, who still only watched my package without accepting it, so I simply extended my hand further.

"Rather than giving it with that intention, I wanted to give it with a purer sense of gratitude."

"...What is this?"

The voice that finally emerged after a long pause was as low and pleasant as usual. I gathered a bit more courage and placed the package directly in his hand.

"Today is apparently Chocolate Day. The kind of day when lovers exchange sweet things."

He still didn't respond.

"These are the first cookies I've ever made in my life."

So I lifted my gaze from staring only at his hands and looked up at him. His face—which I'd expected to be rigid like before, or leisurely like in the hall—instead looked... somehow subtly crumbled, his eyes shaking violently.

"Your Highness, how was today? Overwhelming with your chest as the opening move..."

Bang! The sturdy, ornate carriage door slammed shut hard enough to shatter. Wind rose enough to make Neil's bangs flutter. What on earth happened to make him look like he could kill someone? Neil, bewildered, gave instructions to the coachman with appropriate caution.

Having returned with an expression opposite to when he'd left that morning, offending Rhodness's mood would likely result in not even recovering one's bones. Hup! As the coachman's voice rang out, Rhodness's consciousness inside the carriage cleared slightly.

"This makes no sense."

Rhodness muttered while looking at the small cookie package clutched in his hand. Through the rapidly moving carriage window, the deepened sunset light leaked in. Eyes like boiling lava glittered whenever they caught the light.

『In the eastern region, there are many famous bakeries. On days worth celebrating, people line up in front of the bakeries—diligent people make things like cookies or pudding to gift to friends or lovers.

Once I'm healthier, I imagine going with the maids and my nanny to carefully select ingredients and bake cookies. Both making them and giving them as gifts would smell sweet—it would make me happy.

If someday my health improves enough for me to make cookies myself... may I give them to you as a gift? If you'd eat them happily, it would truly make me joyful.』

"This... makes no sense."

Though it was merely a small cookie package, Rhodness repeated like someone who'd seen a corpse.

'These are the first cookies I've ever made in my life.'

He'd definitely been the one to seduce her. Novian's mistress had definitely blushed looking at him, clearly showed signs of tension. He wasn't a fool. No matter how much someone pretended to have naive aspects, they couldn't fake everything—not the sound of a pounding heart, not a face flushed to the neck, not a body trembling finely.

His plan had been proceeding smoothly. Novian's mistress, easily seduced like other women, would eventually be forced to reveal her true intentions. That's what he'd thought. Until he saw Adrienne's image in that woman's shy eyes.

Rhodness felt the vibrations of the carriage racing at full speed along steep stone roads as he dragged his hands down his face. No matter how roughly he scrubbed at his face, the feeling of being possessed by something wouldn't fade.

What if the heartbeat he'd heard wasn't only Bliea Acacia's? When that woman—who'd never dared even look at him—rubbed her hair against his chest and looked up at him, hadn't he thought of Adrienne then?

...No.

He had. He'd had no choice but to think of her, to imagine—Adrienne looking at him with those eyes. Adrienne who must have looked at Novian with that face. To hide his suddenly heating face, he'd harassed an innocent servant and downed drinks in rapid succession—not Novian's mistress, but himself.

"Ha."

Rhodness glared at the cookie package rolling slightly each time the carriage swayed, as though it were his mortal enemy.

'I acknowledged it—that I'm currently in an insane state.'

Precisely since that day he'd learned of Adrienne's death in the west. His emotions and mental state had been abnormal even by his own assessment. The hallucination of constantly seeming to see Adrienne in Bliea Acacia—that was merely part of that insanity. But...

'If, following that woman's intentions, I keep wavering and wavering like this...'

...what if I gradually come to think of that woman as Adrienne's substitute? Rhodness's face went deathly pale.

All the way back to his own palace, far from Atilchard Hall, not only before his eyes but inside his heart—Adrienne's past letters and Bliea's guileless expression and that damned cookie package kept rolling ceaselessly about.

Rhodness realized that his plan—which he'd thought could only succeed—had gone completely awry from the very first day.